Hesitation

Hesitation. I have mastered hesitation. I hesitate every time I'm sitting at the drive thru- even though I already know what I'm going to order. Hesitation before I boldly walk up to him to say hi knowing I'm too awkward to say anything else. I then find a reason to leave because I will hesitate doing anything but leaving the situation. I  Hesitate before I sing hymns  in church just to make sure everyone else is singing so I wasn't the only one suffering through the monotone mumbles of the congregation.there is a hesitation before I do something brave- because I know the possibility and the reality of failure.  I hesitate before jumping into the icy lake knowing the consequences. My toes stretch to touch the top of the water then I decide its not worth it. Hesitation before I try something new. Something new that might damage my pride and leave me vulnerable. Something new that leaves me broken and lost.Hesitation before being honest. i don't want to hesitate, i just do. Being honest with you is hard not because I'm a liar but because sometimes I'm not a fan of reality. Because sometimes reality hurts and tears people apart. Hesitation. Doubts. Unsurities . And Insecurities. These are real. Real because they make us human. They make us who we are. And this I who I am- even though I strive to not be hesitant. Evan let me be honest, bold, and brave. I hesitate to let go her, because Evan let me be someone who I wasn't.  So Evan taught me this trick of being blunt and honest. So here it goes, kids. My name is Shaelie Wood and I am behind the bold curtain of Evan Lindstrom.

Why do we feel that it's not worth it? Not worth it because of failure. Guess what- it's worth it. Life is worth being honest to yourself. And life is worth being brave and bold.  And Life is worth it because it could be gone within a matter of seconds. Thanks Evan.